Will explain later, but in a sour mood right now. Nervous if I let the feelings go loose, I'll look like a loony.

So the answer to last night questions, where I think positive or negative of my outcome - I thought negative, in a postive way. I knew in my heart that 1 guest would bail, and she did. What does that explain of the other 30? Easy... 25 never returned my calls or emails. Out of the possible 5, one was sick and didn't get any of my messages, 1 spaced and forgot about it, 1 was going to go only if her daughter would go, and the daughter (another 1) decided she didn't want to. So for me, zero.

After shedded tears and a long talk with Stephanie and Debbie, they pointed clear blank, even if these guests came, or not.. their flakeness showed to me, I don't want them as a team member anyway. Not that I was out to recruit or anything last night, just wanted to enjoy someone's company last night for crying outloud.

But I was, and still so mad. I give all these customers great service, I send beau-ku samples that eat me out of money, exchange their product with no problem, and yet, one measily night out, what's the deal? I mean, when my consultant called me and said "support me", did I hem? Haw? Back out? NO! I said Yes, don't recruit me, I don't want to do Mary Kay. Ok, so 4 months later I did sign my agreement. But that's me. I would sign about anything if I knew it was good for me. But I'm not asking them to sign up. I'm not asking for their money, I'm asking them to enjoy themselves. I know these women, I work with these women, I know the crappy jobs we are in, why not take a break and enjoy the night? Ferk. I'm so upset.